Back in Malaga I have a smart idea.

Marbella was fun for the weekend, but by Monday it turned into a huge retirement village for the lucky few from all over Europe and Russia. Even the cruise ships were just bringing in more grey hair. A few wigs and colourful tints. All retired people - very few retired people buy art, their houses are already full of stuff they need to uffload to pay for the drugs to keep them healthier and alive longer. Some seem to worry that money is going to run out before they die and the drugs just keep getting more expensive. Personally, I see a very simple solution, but I will probably change my mind if I ever make it passed 70.

Police would not let me work either. Strictly no 'street activity' without permission, so obviously I can't reccomend for those wanting to 'Fund Their Own Travel Adventure' for anything other than a good, affordable, off-season break.

I don't like smartphones.

For all the good I see in smartphones etc I see more damage. Mostly damage to my sketches on the ground as people walk over them whilst Twattering and Feckbooking. "Sorry" they say, "I didn't see them". Well look where you're walking then there is no need to feel the need to apologise. Can't be a nice feeling (like people give a flying f***).

I need to tap into the peoples' love affair with the smartphone. This is how an artist is going to try:

I suspect almost everybody using a smartphone will have a favourite photo on their device. A picture of a friend, a loved one, pet (or, most likely a f****** selfie!). Simply email me the photo (in original file size and format so I can print it out after optimising) and I will turn it into a beautiful charcoal and ink portrait for collection the next day. €10 deposit, a further €29 on collection, or delivery. If I get the orders I could comfortably churn out Four a day.

The perfect Christmas gift :)